Week one picks are so overdone, so I just avoided them. Plus, I had real work that had to get done, and I was too depressed over the Falcons ‘game’ to write any reflections. But here’s week 2? That’s actually twice as good as week one. So there. Home teams in bold, picking with Wednesday spreads…as if gambling were legal in America. Ha.
Steelers (-9.5) over Bills
Pittsburgh looked really good last week, but then again, they were playing the Browns. With Big Ben producing like he did pre-old lady hitting him with a car, the Bills will continue their march to miss the playoffs for the entire century. Losing a close game to the Broncos and losing a player like
Bengals (-7) over Browns
Ocho Cinco and that other Mr. Palmer will try to outdo what the Big Ben did last week. They’ll match the touchdowns, with more passing yards, and probably give up more points. Though this game won’t be within the spread.
Colts (-7) over Titans
Lots of favorites winning so far huh? Colts look to continue the trend, as the running game of the former Oilers won’t be nearly as effective against a much improved Colts defense. And I don’t like the fact that the only member of the Tennessee secondary I can name is a tag team champ.
Texans (+6.5) over Panthers
Don’t ask me why, because I just don’t know. I got this feeling that Schaub is so happy to be quarterbacking for real that they won’t lose by a touch or better, even on the road. The Carolina D is a year older, and the Texans receivers have a real quarterback.
Rams (-3) over Niners
This could get ugly.
Packers (+1) over New Jersey A
Let’s see. Bret Favre against a suspect secondary, in decent weather, with a hungry Packers defense verses a (never thought I’d say this) Jarad Lorenzen-led Giants team? This wins our stupidest line of the week award.
Jax (-10.5) over Falcons
2nd biggest line of the week? Seems about right. Here is where I want to put an addendum on my ‘cautiously non-negative’ stance on the season; I thought that the Dirty Birds could play decent enough defense, maintain the running game, and that Joe Horn would be a stabilizing influence on our receivers. We still can’t catch, and that handcuffs all other facets of what I still think is an amazing Bobby Petrino offense. It’s sad really.
Saints (-4) over Bucs
Angry Drew Brees and co. at a very bad Tampa Bay team. After getting embarrassed on opening night, you’d think that the spread would be bigger, given the revenge factor. I guess not.
Vikes (+3) over Lions
Every year, people get seduced by the Mike Martz offense, going as far to say that this is the year that the offense really breaks out. Too bad that is every year, and even worse that they’re playing an amazing defense that will compensate for the fact that Tavaris Jackson is the quarterback.
Cowboys (-4) over Mia
Enough with picks, I take week 5 and the under for the inevitable Trent Green season-ending concussion. C’mon, the Chiefs passed on him for the lights out combo of Damon Huard and Brodie Croyle! It has to happen, he must fall!
Seattle (-3) over Zona
Arizona choked away their best shot to gain a foothold in the NFC West late, late, LATE Monday night. Coupling the facts that Arizona is the team version of the Mike Martz seduction phenomenon I already discussed, and Shaun Alexander appears to be kind of back, and that’s enough to ground the Cardinals.
NJB (+10) over Ravens
No filming needed. I know the old Browns are going to win, its just that I have negative faith in the offense to score 10. Maybe a few defense scores?
Broncs (-10) over Oak-town
One of the few true rivalries left in football, mainly because Shanahan actually hates Al Davis. Now, Mr. Davis’ feelings for the Broncos are unknown, mostly because Al has been a stuffed automaton since 2001.
Chi (-12.5) over KC
Larry Johnson continues his quest to become the first back to carry over 500 times in a season, simply because both quarterbacks they have to choose from are awful. Just as I know that LJ will have a bunch of carries, I also know that Gross-man will continue his hot/cold start alternation with a good showing against a bad team.
NE (-4) over San Diego
The obligatory “I have no idea” pick of the week. On the one hand, there’s tons of revenge factor with San Diego looking to avenge the playoff loss, there’s Norv Turner trying to prove he’s a coach, and New England doesn’t have the sideline film crew anymore. On the other hand, Randy Moss has a real quarterback again.
Philly (-7) over Wash
Donovan F. Baby, please say the Baby. Beatin’ up on Washington like crack in the 80s. With that amateur flow behind us, and major apologies to Lil’ Wayne, the Eagles will redeem themselves after such an abysmal showing last week in Cheese Land against a division rival.
Steelers (-9.5) over Bills
Pittsburgh looked really good last week, but then again, they were playing the Browns. With Big Ben producing like he did pre-old lady hitting him with a car, the Bills will continue their march to miss the playoffs for the entire century. Losing a close game to the Broncos and losing a player like
Bengals (-7) over Browns
Ocho Cinco and that other Mr. Palmer will try to outdo what the Big Ben did last week. They’ll match the touchdowns, with more passing yards, and probably give up more points. Though this game won’t be within the spread.
Colts (-7) over Titans
Lots of favorites winning so far huh? Colts look to continue the trend, as the running game of the former Oilers won’t be nearly as effective against a much improved Colts defense. And I don’t like the fact that the only member of the Tennessee secondary I can name is a tag team champ.
Texans (+6.5) over Panthers
Don’t ask me why, because I just don’t know. I got this feeling that Schaub is so happy to be quarterbacking for real that they won’t lose by a touch or better, even on the road. The Carolina D is a year older, and the Texans receivers have a real quarterback.
Rams (-3) over Niners
This could get ugly.
Packers (+1) over New Jersey A
Let’s see. Bret Favre against a suspect secondary, in decent weather, with a hungry Packers defense verses a (never thought I’d say this) Jarad Lorenzen-led Giants team? This wins our stupidest line of the week award.
Jax (-10.5) over Falcons
2nd biggest line of the week? Seems about right. Here is where I want to put an addendum on my ‘cautiously non-negative’ stance on the season; I thought that the Dirty Birds could play decent enough defense, maintain the running game, and that Joe Horn would be a stabilizing influence on our receivers. We still can’t catch, and that handcuffs all other facets of what I still think is an amazing Bobby Petrino offense. It’s sad really.
Saints (-4) over Bucs
Angry Drew Brees and co. at a very bad Tampa Bay team. After getting embarrassed on opening night, you’d think that the spread would be bigger, given the revenge factor. I guess not.
Vikes (+3) over Lions
Every year, people get seduced by the Mike Martz offense, going as far to say that this is the year that the offense really breaks out. Too bad that is every year, and even worse that they’re playing an amazing defense that will compensate for the fact that Tavaris Jackson is the quarterback.
Cowboys (-4) over Mia
Enough with picks, I take week 5 and the under for the inevitable Trent Green season-ending concussion. C’mon, the Chiefs passed on him for the lights out combo of Damon Huard and Brodie Croyle! It has to happen, he must fall!
Seattle (-3) over Zona
Arizona choked away their best shot to gain a foothold in the NFC West late, late, LATE Monday night. Coupling the facts that Arizona is the team version of the Mike Martz seduction phenomenon I already discussed, and Shaun Alexander appears to be kind of back, and that’s enough to ground the Cardinals.
NJB (+10) over Ravens
No filming needed. I know the old Browns are going to win, its just that I have negative faith in the offense to score 10. Maybe a few defense scores?
Broncs (-10) over Oak-town
One of the few true rivalries left in football, mainly because Shanahan actually hates Al Davis. Now, Mr. Davis’ feelings for the Broncos are unknown, mostly because Al has been a stuffed automaton since 2001.
Chi (-12.5) over KC
Larry Johnson continues his quest to become the first back to carry over 500 times in a season, simply because both quarterbacks they have to choose from are awful. Just as I know that LJ will have a bunch of carries, I also know that Gross-man will continue his hot/cold start alternation with a good showing against a bad team.
NE (-4) over San Diego
The obligatory “I have no idea” pick of the week. On the one hand, there’s tons of revenge factor with San Diego looking to avenge the playoff loss, there’s Norv Turner trying to prove he’s a coach, and New England doesn’t have the sideline film crew anymore. On the other hand, Randy Moss has a real quarterback again.
Philly (-7) over Wash
Donovan F. Baby, please say the Baby. Beatin’ up on Washington like crack in the 80s. With that amateur flow behind us, and major apologies to Lil’ Wayne, the Eagles will redeem themselves after such an abysmal showing last week in Cheese Land against a division rival.
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